


Cool Hawke Has Chill Day

by Mème Brûlée (trixsters)



Series: Cool Hawke has Chill Day [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Domestic, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2015-11-28
Packaged: 2018-05-03 18:17:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5301797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trixsters/pseuds/M%C3%A8me%20Br%C3%BBl%C3%A9e
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The daily lives of the Hawke siblings</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cool Hawke Has Chill Day

Once upon a time, the Hawke family was actually really fucking huge. There was Leandra, Bethany, and Carver—but then there was the older siblings. They were a real piece of work. None of the three eldest went by their birth names either. Well, except for Asshat. No one was really sure why he had been named that, but he really lived up to his name. What an asshat. The second eldest, younger by two years and also an elf, adopted into the family, was Cool, and she definitely was the nicest in the family, despite being down for genocide. The middle child, also an adopted elf, was Money, and boy did he love money.

One day, Cool Hawke thought she’d go for a cruise in her Templarmobile with her beloved husband, Cullen. It certainly was a nice day in Kirkwall—as far as Kirkwall days can go, anyway—and she wanted to spend it with her lethallin. As they drove in their Templarmobile, they came across Cool Hawke’s brother, Money Hawke, and his beautiful cinnamon bun, Fenris.

“Ayyy what up H-Money!!” Cool Hawke yelled out the window. “Love, please don’t do that in public,” Cullen sighed, hiding his face in his hands. “Swaggy,” Money Hawke yelled nonchalantly back. Fenris was disgusted. He hated when the Hawke siblings were together. Fenris gripped Money Hakwe’s hand tighter, and when Cool Hawke and Cullen were out of sight, he scoffed, “Those damn Templars. Their son is a mage, you know.” He looked away, seething with disgust.

“Whatev. Let’s go make money! Keep holdin’ my hand though,” Money Hawke said to Fenris before running off and pulling his beautiful cinnamon bun with him. “Stop this!” Fenris groaned, but it was too late. They were going to make sme money.

Asshat Hawke took this opportunity to live up to his name, as he always does, always. There truly was not a more asshat of a person in all of Kirkwall, and probably all of Thedas. Is he even The Champion? No, he isn’t. That title is reserved for Cool Hawke, the elven Templar driving around in her Templarmobile with her Templar husband, Cullen. When Cool Hawke fought the Arishoke, Asshat simply sent their faithful mabari, SnoopDogg, to help Cool Hakwe, and fled screaming like the asshat he truly is. That filthy mage. Desgusting.

Later that evening, the three eldest Hawke’s met back in their home after 3 very different days: one spent with a loving husband, one spent getting cash money, and one spent simply being an asshat, as always.

“So guys, how did your days go?” Money Hawke asked, lying on the floor next to the hearth, drinking in the scent of his new, hard-earned coin.

“Well since you’re asking—”

“Not you,” Asshat Hawke was cut off by Money Hawke stating that he didn’t care, and he turned his large elf eyes to his older sister. She turned away, blushing for a moment (and Asshat took this opportunity to be an asshat, and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively) before turning back and opening her mouth to respond.

“Well, I guess you could say I had a chill day.” 


End file.
